The headline reads: Maid of Dishonor appalls unsuspecting wedding guests; wears otherwise classy dress scrunched up at her hips.
When questioned, she squawked that she needed the added range of motion in her legs that the restrictive sheath silhouette could not provide. Furthermore, she blamed the wedding DJ for playing beloved hits from the 90s that she could not merely shuffle ladily-like to. She cited reasonable logic in her decision making, as children had not been welcome at the celebration, and thus were not in danger of being influenced by the surface area of her exposed thighs. It should be noted that all of the fun guests were understanding, but the boring people took offense. At the end of the night, the MoD showed remorse only that she would look like a giant hair scrunchie in all of the wedding photos, and it will probably lead to her dying alone in her impeccably furnished beach house.
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