Rock the Detox.

So. I had been feeling, well, full of crap. The ramifications of the holiday cookies, fritters, bars, sticks, and nuggets plague my very existence. Dramatic? Yes. Demanding of change? Of course.

I'm detoxing.

I made the entirely too adult decision to start over. Reset my metabolism, flush toxins, cleanse kidneys, and feel like my organs are eating each other.

It's interesting. I have a weird relationship with food. You may have heard me say that eating is one of my favorite parts of being human. I make no exaggeration. I love good food. I like to think that I pay attention to what I eat and enjoy foods close to earth, but make no mistake, I endorse milkshakes.

Ever since college and the Era 'O Beer, I have been changing the way I eat. I cut simple carbs. I cut all artificial sweeteners. I discovered a new love for brussel sprouts (I know, ew! turns out I love 'em). I stopped ingesting liquid cocaine, or energy drinks as you might call them. I eat tons of nuts, fish, and plain yogurt. I aim for the Blue Zone recommendations. I have never felt better. But occasionally I fall off the wagon and mistakenly gorge on enough sugar and baked goods to send Jillian Michaels into a diabetic coma. So then I timeout, break the cycle. I detox.

I choose the Master Cleanse, which consists of drinking a concoction of organic lemon juice, grade b maple syrup, and cayenne pepper. You drink it exclusively for 5-10 days while daily flushing your colon (I wont elaborate but to say that 'pants on fire' is now a personal description). I am currently on day 5/10. I swear, today will be the first day I don't cheat. The past four days I have succumbed to the gut wrenching hunger pains and had a piece of fruit or a few crackers. I'm getting better, promise. In the meantime, I'm finding anything possible to distract. See you in five days. I'll be the ravenous asian girl at PitaPit.