Disgust-xy.

It's late, but I still want to talk about Halloween.  

Instead of looking sexy, I like to look absolutely disgusting on this revered slut-iday.  In fact, I would go so far as to say that looking disgusting on Halloween is when I feel the sexiest.  This is just one of the adorable and weird quirks that I have woven into my consciousness.  Gag. 

The weekend before Halloween this year, I flew to Nashville to spend the time with my bestie, Ashley.  The burger/fry combo had been a sensation of a hit in 2000, during the Valley Christian Fall Spirit Day "Food Fest".  My hometown friend Jasmine and I originated these costumes, won Best Dressed, and were the most popular and revered sophomores for the rest of the year.  I'm not one to waste a bad idea.  So this year, Ashbo (She calls me Mingbo because the first time she tried to text my name, her autocorrect changed it.  and we love it.) and I scoured craft stores in Nashville for the perfect foam sheets and made these costumes that did me so well a decade ago.  

You know what the best part of it was?  We were out at a bar, dancin' and carrying on as usual.  On any other night, young and old men alike would get brazen on the dance floor, descend upon young things like us, and start getting grabby.  It's rude, and an invasion of personal space.  Plus, I need room for my moves.  On this particular night, men would go ahead and descended upon us as usual, reach around our bodies for a feel,  and get a HANDFUL OF FOAM.  Game over.  

For Halloween 2.0, I was back in LA and scurried off to a fun and fancy Hollywood party thrown by a band and set in the famous Forever Cemetery.  Pop princesses and sitcom kings were seen there.  The DJs were renowned musicians.  The alcohol flowed freely.  The decor was outlandish.  

And I showed up spray painted in smurf blue.  Again, the best part?  No one could tell if I was pretty or ugly, hell maybe not even man or woman.  All pressure was taken off the table and I was free to just laugh like a damned fool, dance battle famous comedians, twirl about with drag queens and sweat myself silly.  

Disgusting is sexy.  Start the campaign.