Potty Perspective.

As you might have guessed by my binge blogging as of late, I have had quite a surplus of time on my hands.  Census is really low at work, and I have been cancelled a lot for the past three weeks.  As a traveler, you run the risk of not being needed and thereby being cancelled.  Had I known what I was doing when I signed this contract, I would have negotiated some parameters for this and made sure I would still get paid in this case.  I didn't and so....here I am.  I probably won't get paid this week.  UGH.  So in the midst of my pity party, I am also at a loss as to what to do about my lack of employment come April 11th, when my current assignment is up.  With the lackluster economy our great nation is experiencing, hospitals are clamping down just like everybody else.  They are trying to not use travelers as much as possible, so it's kind of slim pickings here.  I could and have been having anxiety, night sweats, mental breakdowns, and other acts of psychological instability, but I was given some amazing clarity tonight.  My friend Alisa, who is in the same predicament as I, suggested that we drown our sorrows in milkshakes.  We spent the majority of the meal feeling sorry for ourselves and trying to devise a plan to ensure employment in two weeks.  We got nothing.  After we left the diner, I ran back inside to use the little nurse's room where I found this:

This act of vandalism just about knocked me over.    

I realized while I drove home that, perhaps, during this time I really should ask not what my country can do for me.  Maybe considering the positions in Butthole, Nowhere that I have previously turned my nose up to are exactly what I need.  In my never ending quest for fabulosity, I have found myself somewhat devoid of the heart of my profession: service.  I believe that God leads us to those who help us most to grow, if we let Him.  Maybe it's time I acted upon it.  Maybe someone in Butthole, Nowhere needs me.  Maybe I need them.  I don't have a final answer for this, and I'm not saying I wouldn't still jump at the chance to work in San Fran or NYC, but I'm learning that if this is really what I want to do, I need to get over myself a little bit.  I need to push through the unpleasant for love of the game.  I need to not give up.